Putting the Kamikaze Run on the Map

Saifi is meant to be a pedestrian area. How do we know this for sure?

1- There’s nowhere to park

2- The roads are cobblestone and quite narrow

3- The area itself is quite small, so it makes no sense to take up more space with cars than yummy shops

In any case, today we at BOKJA wanted to share with you the irony in what we presume to be the facts above.

When you zoom slightly out of Saifi Village so that you have an aerial view of the area, it is then that you notice that Saifi is actually a pedestrian island surrounded by the thickets and madness of an urban jungle. If you make the mistake of straying outside of Saifi on foot, you may be attacked and killed by the abundant, mechanical predators zooming by so fast that you barely see them.

These vehicles are completely out of control. There are no zebra crossings (surprise, surprise) and the street lights are in the land Far Far Away…Today we are specifically focusing on the “Crossing” (mad, tumultuous river) between Saifi Village and Gemmayze. Note that the “crossings” on the three other sides of Saifi Village (which make up a rectangle) are just as bad…trust me, if not worse.

The only reason we’ve focused on the Saifi-Gemmayze crossing or what the authorities have titled “Georges Haddad St” giving it a deceiving semblance of order…is because that is sadly the road to lunch.

With Paul’s strict “NO DELIVERY” policy not even to neighbors in the hood, and “La Posta Gourmet”‘s daily underestimation of the number of salads needed to satiate Saifi Village’s hungry, we are left with no other option but to make that journey.

We have tried begging Paul to make a single delivery exception explaining that it is definitely safer for someone on a motorbike, we have interrogated La Posta in bewilderment about how it is possible to run out of lettuce in Beirut…we have even gone hungry on one occasion in protest…we have done it all and come to realize, that sadly..and dangerously, there is no way out.

Yes in the 21st century sometimes you have to put your neck on the line to secure the next meal…which has lead one, witty member of the BOKJA team to name the mad, breathless dash to Gemmayze, the “Kamikaze Run”.

So here it is: We introduce to all of you a landmark that is missing from official maps, but which we thought was necessary to single out in the daily landscape of our lives at BOKJA. Look out for it next time, and remember us when you do. Some people have to cross it every day…our thoughts are with you.

Look left, look right...be patient...better to look like an idiot than be sorry!

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